Fantastic Fest Report: Maiko Haaaan!!!, Princess, Flash Point, Offscreen, Postal

Maiko Haaaan!!! plays very well to expectations as a “crazy Japanese comedy,” but it actually has much more to offer. Onizuka (Sadao Abe) works at a giant noodle company in Tokyo. He has idealized and worshiped geishas ever since he encountered them on a school trip to Kyoto. He runs a web site devoted to them; one day he is engaged in a flame war with a mocking commenter. When he is transferred by his company to Kyoto, he thinks it is a dream come true, though in truth it’s a demotion—the Kyoto branch is relegated to making only toppings for the noodles.

He quickly dumps his girlfriend and, upon arriving in Kyoto, promptly tries to enter a geisha house to partake of its pleasures. He is rebuffed; geisha houses do not allow any “1st timers.” Customers must be recommended and sponsored by another; it’s all a matter of trust, you see. His company’s CEO tells Onizuka that he will sponsor him if he comes up with an idea that makes a lot of money. Onizuka has built up such an idealized image of geishas that is motivated to do so.

After many months of hard work, he finally gets inside a geisha house, where, after yet another delay involving a pair of shoes and a hospital stay, he encounters the man who flamed his web site. That man turns out to be a famous baseball player, which inflames Onizuka’s competitive spirit.

The great success of the film is the idea that a total geek—Onizuka, as played by Sadao Abe—can transform himself into something mighty with the right motivation. It’s taken to ridiculous, and extremely funny, extremes by director Nobuo Mizuta and screenwriter Kankuro Kudo (Ping Pong, Yaji and Kita: The Midnight Pilgrims). The narrative also veers off on unexpected though diverting tangents—a musical number, a geisha training montage—and entwines a rather sweet, naive romance at the core.

The romantic machinations tend to draw out the running time and lessen the impact of the comedy, but, overall, Maiko Haaaan!!! works very well and kept the Fantastic Fest audience laughing throughout.

Offscreen pretends to be composed of footage shot entirely by actor Nicolas Bro, who wanted to document his life for one year. After newspaper headlines are presented showing that Bro has disappeared, we rewind to director Christoffer Boe giving Bro a video camera and giving him a couple of pointers ("Show yourself when you ask a question. Now show me answering. There, you’ve shot a scene.")

The early scenes are the typical foolishness of any fledging filmmaker, ordinary domestic scenes with an obtrusive camera poking into the home shared by Bro and his girlfriend Lene Maria Christensen, and occasional forays into the outdoors. But then we see Bro surreptitiously and futilely chasing after her, waiting for her to glance back at him after they have parted to prove that she loves him. It’s one of those silly romantic fantasies, the idea that two people can form some sort of mental bond that transcends time and space, but he becomes quite upset when it doesn’t work out, and we get an inkling that all may not be right with the actor.

Soon enough an escalating argument erupts, the silliness drops away, and a rocky relationship is revealed. Eventually Lene leaves him, and Bro is left on his own, desperately reaching out to a none too compassionate friend, Lene’s parents, and Signe Skov, an actress friend with whom he tries to spend time. Director Boe shows up, too, but maintains his distance.

In many ways the film itself insists on a shoulder’s length distance from the viewer. The footage looks authentically amateurish, which is off-putting enough, but the supposed “caught on reality” moments are, subtly but obviously, staged carefully. In other words, we know the film is fiction, not fact, and there’s no point at which you are fooled into thinking otherwise.

But director Christoffer Boe is not aiming here at the artificiality and absurdities of reality television, which is a well-worn and easy target. Instead, he uses those conventions to disguise a carefully drawn character study. Nicolas Bro has been a friendly and gregarious prescence for years in supporting roles like Adam’s Apples and Dark Horse. The alternate version of himself that he’s playing in Offscreen, a man who starts out bumbling and good natured before being transformed into something awful, pathetic and deadly, is a tremendous part that he underplays to the hilt.

I was exhausted and fighting sleep when I saw Offscreen. After the adrenaline buzz of Flash Point, it was quite a comedown in the energy level and the unattractive visuals are assaultive on a big screen. But the more I think about it, the more impressed I am, and I look forward to catching up with it again—but I need some time to recover from the draining experience.

Related Links

• Maiko Haaaan!!! - FF Page
• Maiko Haaaan!!! - Trailer - Twitch
• Princess - FF Page
• Princess - Review - Twitch - Todd Brown
• Princess - Review - Twitch - Arrdvark
• Flash Point - FF Page
• Flash Point - Review - Twitch - Stefan
• Flash Point - Review - Twitch - Todd Brown
• Flash Point - Review - Twitch - Mack
• Offscreen - FF Page
• Offscreen - Trailer - Twitch
• Postal - FF Page
• Postal - Review - Twitch - Todd Brown
• Postal - Q & A - Twitch
• Postal - Interview with Uwe Boll - Twitch - Michael Guillen