Revenge of the Fallen is an apt title for any sequel perpetrated by Michael Bay precisely because fallenness appears to be the primary drive behind his particular brand of excess. Not content to load his film with lots of explosions, and reasonably well executed CGI special effects sequences, which like many of his other films could fall under the category of innocently giddy if incoherent cinema, he insists (as he did in his other infamous sequel Bad Boy II) in heaping sin upon what could have been a really fun enterprise. Forget the fact that the movie sprawls yawningly over 2 1/2 hours and plays like an self indulgent introduction to a videogame with exposition after exposition. Forget the fact that the action sequences in this film don’t even hold a candle to the artistry on display in the first film, Transformers 2 Revenge of the Fallen is a stupidly racist, sexist, mess.
Sexist? The first shot is a butt/crotch shot of Megan Fox in denim short shorts leaning over a motorcycle with her legs spread far enough apart to invite a peek to make sure the wardrobe and makeup people took care of that all important money shot bikini wax. Is she a strong female character? Is she intelligent, resourceful brave? Yes, as much so as the horrible dialogue and lots of screaming and running will let her be. Other brilliant bits of sexual humor include a chihuahua humping a pug dog, a chihuahua humping a pug dog again, and again and a chihuahua-like robot humping Megan Fox on the leg. There’s also a supermodel desperately trying to hump one-woman Sam for reasons known only to the Decepticons. This is tired old stuff that wouldn’t work in the best of hands. Here it’s thrown in as filler between action scenes and ought to play great for all those jock and frat types who so desperately need another excuse as to why they objectify women.
Racist? How about two twin robot funny cars named Mudflap and Skids. They arrive complete with ebonics, gold teeth, and most importantly an inability to read that is awkwardly and pointedly made fun of in between their many, many fight scenes where they fight... each other.... yo. This is what Robert Downey Jr. meant when he said that you should never go full ‘tard folks. These two jive turkey idiots arrive compliments of the vocal stylings of Tom Kenney who presumably read the script and considered the fact that he is WHITE before taking on the roles. Even on the page this would send anyone with common sense scurrying out of the meeting. But then “the meeting” seems like it’s always been the biggest part of the Michael Bay package when it comes to movie making.
The plot has the Autobots scrambling to keep a cosmic shard out of the hands of Megatron and his cronies. When Optimus approaches Sam for help the college bound kid begs off, “I’m just a normal kid with normal problems.” Of course, soon, events beyond his control force him to save the world again. The sad thing here is the way the talented cast is saddled by the poor script. Everyone here pulls off their part and looks like they’re having fun doing it but they can’t possibly make it fun for us. Bay constantly pulls his camera back to reveal characters having moments he hasn’t given us any significant reason to care about. And the too few moments of real humor are shoehorned into a plot that leaves no room for them to blossom into anything that even resembles character development. Everyone arrives here whole cloth, completely formed and barely changes at all on their journey. Though Bay has loaded this movie down with more than twice as many robots the effect diminishes with repetition. In the first film it was almost as if you could see where each individual part of the Transformer went when it transformed. Here, as often as not, the camera pulls in tight so that you never feel you get a good look at what’s happening.
Hasbro created Transformers to sell toys and Bay makes movies about Transformers to sell tickets. Fair enough. But they were giving away kiddie comics and books at the screening I was at. This was stuff clearly intended to encourage parents to bring their kids to a screening later. Low rent, not-thought-through marketing by any stretch of the imagination. I’ll put it this way. Ever notice how much Bay looks like Fabio? This isn’t a digression, just be patient. Pictures of Fabio don’t do the guy justice. I’ve heard that he’s a nice intelligent man who’s actually quite humble about his good looks. Transformers 2 is like that picture of Fabio. I want to believe that Michael Bay is more than just a lout with clout and I want to believe he surrounds himself with people who can help provide some sort of base accountability for things other than the bottom line. But that isn’t the picture I get from the way this movie was written, made, cast or marketed. Michael, for someone who is known to desperately cling to every ounce of control he can in making and marketing his movies I suggest some introspection before you make another one.
was that a critical review? You should have just written "I hate Michael Bay and Transformers 2" and have been done with it
blah blah blah dude.
Relax, it's just a movie.
It seems like you guys are expecting way too much from a Transformers sequel! You point out that T2RF is racist and sexist. But, the first Transformers was the same way. They had shots of Megan Fox, and they had Jazz. What's the difference? Is there really a need to make it seem like this movie was any different? Big explosions... Surprise Surprise. It's Transformers 2. You can't expect a full out Autobots v. Decepticons death match without over the top explosions and it being loud.
And also, was it even necessary for you to add that he looks pretty? I mean, if you hate him cause he's good-looking, hate him. Don't judge his talents on his looks. Should he look grungy? I mean, what should you look like to be considered a good director?
I agree with Theodore_, you should have said even less. "Hated it" would have sufficed... if that.
I agree with the previous posters: please dumb down the movie reviews that are about movies that are dumbed down, so people who hate to read come to this site to read reviews don't get their feelings hurt.
It's for the best.
as for the other guys who posted tips on "how it's done," remember this - even the functionally-retarded adults with the lowest of expectations are going to have to endure 2 1/2 hours of shit exploding with barely any explanations to hold it all together.
Are you sure you won't get bored?
I know...
"It's just a movie" - that cost you $10 a ticket.
Loose cash and low expectations make for a successful circus, for sure.
"Forget the fact that the action sequences in this film don’t even hold a candle to the artistry on display in the first film"
What? The first movie was awful.
The first one was my favourite movie of all time.
Can't wait to see this at the Electric in Notting hill (if it ever gets there)
This must be the "Official Shit-On Michael Bay Week" :) Not that he cares. With all the money he makes, he can probably build a real giant transforming robot that can shit all over us. Oh wait....he's already doing that...cinematically that is.
Although Soul-less, the man can definitely make films that appeal to the masses and keep the box office cash registers ringing.
"artistry on display in the first film"
Good one that one.
I do think the first one did an admirable job of bringing the Transformers to life - at least visually. This second one is way too frenetic. As for hating on Bay, comparing him to Fabio- I didn't compare him to Fabio, but to peoples assumptions about Fabio. In Fabios case they seem unjustified. In Bays case they are justified via his careless attitude toward the craft of storytelling. He really does seem to be ads shallow a storyteller as anybody ever thought Fabio was as a human being.
The first Transformers film was FAR less offensive than this one.
Why don't some of the people here just admit that they absolutely hate people that like Bay's films? It's painfully obvious, so just admit it.
I never said I liked Bay films... I actually HATE Bay films except Transformers (the first one)But I'm going to see it in an hour so I'll finally see what you all are saying. :)
I don't HATE the people that like Bay's films, I hate the fact that they are willing to overlook or forgive horrifically fascist, mysoginistic xenophobia and easily dismiss it as light entertainment. Who cares if Bay looks like Fabio. Read his interviews, the guy's a creep.
I thought that ppl are idiots here now am sure, well at least 80% of you.
Transformers The First was awesome ( its an action movie about robots )
Transformers The Second was awesome too ( action movie with more robots )
Eveyrthing is at it should be, Transformers were never and will never be a movie with deep and inteligent and provocative storyline, I mean did ya all forgot the damn cartoon, it was simple it was miserable but for us in that age the biggest fun there was.
Also when ppl say there was no just to the robots, go to hell you miserable ppl, they are made to look as they should look when they transform and when hey talk and when they fight, ppl used brains to make them like that so dont shit around.
BTW it looks like now in 21st century ppl tend to find racism everywhere, where is the freedom we had once, it wasnt over the line, not in first part not in the second, you're making an elephant out of a fly.
What is this shit about humor, it was ok not bad but ok, the movie is not intended to be a comedy, if you want inteligent comedies go and find them.
The movie is one good action summer flick, go and see it, and hope for The Third, because I am.
P.S.
Also I noticed the bitching about the two and a half hour timeline, what the hell is wrong with you. Bitching when its short, bitching when its long, OMG find a life.
he got me convinced. robots justify everything ! don't think, consume. go out and find it.
This movie exists to make a very small number of people very, very rich. Because this is a lemming movie. No matter what anyone says about it, us or the numerous number of reviewers also dishing out the dislike for this film, we're still going to show up in droves and jump off that proverbial cliff together. It knows its target audience and it takes them for granted. Only a couple years from now will they see how tainted its worldview really is and what it says about our culture. Never underestimate the influence of cinema.
So far it seems the reviews of it's awfulness is more entertaining than the movie itself.
Have you read the one over at io9? Because you should, it's gold: http://io9.com/5301898/michael-bay-finally-made-an-art-movie?skyline=true&s=i
Not that I'll see it or anything.
I'm also with Rhythm-X. I'll sit this cliff jumping out.
That being said, wasting small dollops of time passive-agressively bashing Michael Bay - I'M IN! That's a sport worth playing....on occasion anyway...
it's funny. when someone says "TF2 is sexist and racist," the Bay fandom immediately jumps in and says "you shouldn't go see a Transformer movie expecting intelligence and art."
so, does this mean it's OK to be racist and sexist as long as you're lowbrow?
fun and entertaining movies don't have to be intelligent, but they also don't have to be stupid or racist. where in Canfield's review, and HOW, was he saying he expected an artistic and intelligent script?
Shit, with the two reviews we have here including the comments (and thanks for the link to the laugh-out-loud io9 review!) I'm no longer sure whether to be curious or scared.
I want to see it myself to check if it REALLY is as bad a movie as people are saying, and to see if the special effects hold up to the bits I liked about the trailer.
But now I get the impression that my first reason is actually dangerous, because it will help funding some right-wing extremist nutcase AND rot my brain at the same time.
While the second reason won't be valid either as the "stop shaking the damn camera so I can see what's happening" factor is even worse than with the first movie.
The single thing I hated most about the first movie was how badly edited together the several fragments were. Seeing Optimus Prime squaring off against that rollerscating decepticon on the highway was awesome in itself, probably the single biggest highlight in the movie, but the few minutes before and after where grating in their senselessness. You hear Shia yell "Watch out for that police car!!", but... what police car?? I get it's the same bastard from earlier in the movie, but where is it? What happens to it? Ten seconds later and it's dismissed.
Hearing the second film is even more fragmented and shaky dismays me. I hoped the first movie was only plagued with it because of its creators trying to get to grips with the technology, last minute script-changes, rushing it half-unfinished into cinemas hoping the few spectacular bits would save it. But now it seems these things are heralded as what made the first movie great and have been expanded upon.
Crap!
I wanted to watch this half-drunk this weekend with friends, putting my brain on autopilot and just let the endorphine seep in. Instead I fear I will be irritated beyond belief by this film, frustrated at not being able to see what happens during the parts that are "teh awsom" and offended by what happens inbetween...
I enjoyed Transformers: RotF. Most of it anyway. I, too,found Mudflap and Skids to be racist caricatures, but they were less racist than Jar Jar Binks by far. However, it is going too far to say that the movie is sexist. The men in the audience actually WANT to see Megan Fox. Bay is giving them just that. Hell, my wife kept going on about how hot Fox is in the film. By Canfield's standards, pretty much every other film Hollywood makes would be sexist and exploitative. Remember The Mask? How sexist was Cameron Diaz's first scene?
I'm an Optimus Prime fan. Full stop. Prime kicks A CRAPLOAD of arse in this film. Peter Cullen as Optimus Prime is an absolute win in any situation. I could care less about Michael Bay. He may be a creep for all I know, but one thing he has never stopped being is Michael Bay, and you need to go into his films with a specific mindset and scraping-the-bottom expectations.
Much of Transformers RotF screens like an extended recruitment advertisement for the US military. I found it hilarious that the US government would pay Sam and his parents to be quiet about the 'aliens', instead of shipping them to Guantanamo Bay. It is likewise unbelievable that an 'international' team consisting of only US and UK operatives would be allowed to operate on Chinese and Egyptian soil. It's obvious that Michael Bay belongs to the right-wing camp, but this film is about as fascist as a Tom Clancy novel. Canfield is remarkably unaware that the percentage of mainstream Hollywood action films which fail to portray American military personnel as heroic, just, and the pinnacle worshipped the world over is woefully small. This trend has been going on forever, from the culture of 'heroic cowboys' fighting the 'devious Indians' to the honourable Bruce Willis fighting against the African savages in Tears of The Sun. However, none of this makes Michael Bay particularly abhorrent, at least not among American pop filmmakers. Whether his personal beliefs are reflected in his films or otherwise, he is fulfilling the expectations (or fantasies) of his primary target audience: teenage American boys. Also, let us not forget that the US military will not allow the loan of its equipment for filming (which significantly cuts costs for the studio) unless they are presented in a (very) positive light.
All in all, I found Transformers RotF to be enjoyable for anyone who liked the first one, faults included. And no, I am not blind to the inherent problems the film and the filmmaker possess. I just do not find it as bad as Canfield described, and I certainly do not find Michael Bay to be the most offensive of American filmmakers.
"I suspect Tesla is really ChevalierAguila working the satirical angles."
Nah, if i was trying to do a satire i would had added more stuff in the vein of "Dood, transfoermers ROCKED MY SOCKZ AND U PPL CAN GO SUCK A DONG!"
Also, i liked Mack's term: lemming movie, i might steal it.
Damn....I hope Mr. Bay makes alot of Money !!!
@Che: You don't have to steal it. Use it freely. Everyone mark this down in their calendars. This is the day that 'lemming movie' starts to grow.
Michael Bay, like anyone else, is perfectly entitled to believe and behave in whatever manner he chooses. If it's in him to be a complete ass, then that's his prerogative. Similarly, as a filmmaker, he's just as entitled to carry across his personality and beliefs into his work. He's hardly the first director guilty of doing this.
What I have a problem with is actually the studios. In an age when Bruce Willis can't kick Die hard ass beyond a PG-13 rating, why is it that profanity is considered such a dire no-no, while racism, sexism, and vulgarity are deemed "cute" and perfectly acceptible elements to include in what so obviously is being marketed as a children's movie?
The studio should hire a third party director to edit the crap out of this movie, removing all offensive material so that what remains is a proper PG-13 rated film. Granted, they'd probably only end up with a 30-minute movie, but at least they'd know where to add in more non-offensive materials to flesh out the storyline. Then, they could later capitalize on the Bayisms with a special "Director's Cut" DVD release. Makes ever so much more sense than an "Unrated" DVD release with one or two extra seconds of film added in that add absolutely nothing to the film.
So... how does it measure up to the animated movie from twenty-odd years back?
(ducks and covers..)
Funny you mention that. They blatantly rip off a plotline from the animated movie, but because the movie was all over the place, I really didn't care what happened.
...For the record. I'm preserving the brain cells of my progeny by keeping them sheltered from Mr. Bay's particular brand of auteurism. Miyazaki, Bird, Bluth and even monster movies from the 30s, 40s, 50s are fair game. 'Movies' from Michael Bay are a no go though.
Lol loads of interesting comments that go no where, on the world wide web everyone is correct, thats why we are all Gods in the private ( not that much but you still live in the illusion ) cyber universe.
I love you guys on twitch, varieties prove that we arent all the same, thats good but doesnt prove the difference from other animals and that is the repetitive behaviour of every sequel there is ( you know how it is primal reptile and mammal brain thats beneath our so called intelligent one ).
Sex sells, am not into Megan Fox, kinda tend to like girls with brains, no need to jump on that subject, ppl like her, ppl went to see her jumping and wearing short pants.
I tried to tell you that Transformers are about robots and our love for them and you....oh ho hoo... you keep trashing our childhood heroes ( I have many like shitload of us here, and transformers hold a dear place ) thats why am trying to protect the movie from bashing and hatred.
100% true is the fact that the movie will earn hundreds of millions and thats what pleases me because I want more of them, hollywood brought us a lof of bad movies lately but its nothing new, a fact from the start of their creation, some are good most of them are bad. Lets not hate the action genre for being what it is...an action genre! Figths, effects, explosions...et cetera et cetera
"Lol loads of interesting comments that go no where"
I fail to see where are you going beyond "hey guys, movies with robots are cool and i like them"
Leave him alone! Someone has to protect TRANSFORMERS 2 from bashing and hatred!
I feel like I've seen this movie, now.
I am Absolutely terrified that the characters REVENGE OF THE FALLEN are going to be portrayed as a couple of hicks with dumb voices who are all goofy and ridiculous. That's the kind of “broad strokes” character development i can do without. http://www.Start-an-Internet-business.net
Because you can never have too much fun slamming this movie everyone should take a look at this. It makes me laugh wholeheartedly.
http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/06/bonus_robs_transformers_2_faqs.php
Unless of course you haven't seen the film and you are sure that if YOU see it everything will be okay, cause there be spoilers in that there article, yar!